Saturday, December 4, 2010

1000 pound Gorilla

Fighting evil is like fighting cancer or a 1000 pound gorilla. You can’t really fight it. You can avoid it, prepare for it, and deny that it will change anything, but you can’t fight it.

I am at a spot in my life where I have found something I am passionate about doing to nurture my personal capital. I raise money for non-profits by staging events and coordinating them. I am proud of the work, enjoy the ups and downs and believe I am worth every cent I am paid. But then the politics come into play. Politics are like fighting a 1000-pound gorilla. You can’t fight it, you can avoid, play along, turn turtle or just ignore it.

I get why the gorilla wants to fight. He has risen to his level of incompetence (It’s called the “Peter Principle”, no really, it is) and wants to make boat loads of money for doing nothing.

I wish I could be like that, but my personality doesn’t let me. I must work, at multiple tasks, have many projects in various levels of development, and keep up the happy persona. I am Sagittarius, I usually don’t follow the horror-scope, but todays just got me:

Your Daily Horoscope

You've been stamping the ground impatiently. You're waiting for the moment to jump into new adventures with renewed vigor after your meditation of the last few months. Sagittarius, know that the moment has almost arrived! You now have the strategy, objective, and means at your disposal to succeed. Just a bit more work remains. Gather your strength and get ready for action!

Looks like I am fighting that 1000-pound gorilla.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

The World's Worst Job

You know the economy is still not so good when you post this ad on Criags list and get over 50 responses:

The yard has gone to the Dogs (Grover Beach)

Husband is out of town and I am hiring behind his back. I need someone to do our dirty work. We have been too busy working and badly neglected our yard. I need a back yard pooper scooper (2 big dogs) for a small but mistreated backyard. Then we need weed whacking, removal of a jasmine vine that is wrapped thru a lattice, weed pulling in the front yard (less than 200 sq ft) and general clean up around our house. I will need you to haul it away. I’m not even sure if the weed whacker works, so you’ll need to bring one. No weirdo's or whacko's. email with questions. But really, it is alot of dog shit and one obnoxious plant, what questions could you have? I will call everyone after it stops raining!

Here were some of my favorite responses:

-Hello.., I'm in GB how soon would you like the job done? I need the cash & have pick-up shit before. I'm also the furthest thing from a whacko/weirdo, just a dad who needs gas $ to visit his kids in S.M. Please reply asap, thank-u

He's a good Dad?

-My named is Bill. I can hook you up.I My number is 805@@#####. Let's get all that shit cleaned up.

I like someone who can hook up my shit!

-2nd attempt, maybe you didnt get my first response. Im in GB, have a truck & can
use the gas $ call at your soonest convienence

Gas Money?

-Hey I saw you add on craigslist and am really interested. I am hard working that has lots of experience in yard care and landscaping. I am have dog myself so dont mind cleaning dog poop.. I have all tools needed and will get the job done fast and efficient. If interested in my help call me at ######

Helps that he’s a dog lover?

-Hi, my name is Cesanne. I am a 21yr old Construction Management senior at Cal-Poly. I work hard and make sure that I get the job done promptly. Please let me know if I can be of service to you as I am currently in desperate need of some cash. I can build pretty much anything, landscape, wash, clean, weed and much more. Please let me know if I can help! Thank You,

This is what a degree gets you these days.

-hi my name is james and i am interested in helping u with your yard.....please call me if you would like me to help.....i have tools, i am a college grad and experienced in many phases of maintaining properties....

Another proud college graduate!

-Hi there, love your posting. I would love to help you out now that the rain has ceased.. My name is Jeff and can be reached at ######

What you don’t like wet dog shit?

-hi my name is josh looking for work if you are still in need of someone i have my own weed wacker and car if you still need someone please give me a call at ######

A man with a weed wacker, that’s assets!

- Hello, my name is Jaime and I need some work during an intirim unemployment period. Have you found someone yet? I used to work landscape around SLO and have done a few yards myself on a clean up. My number is 805####### thinking Friday would be best because of the recent rain :) go ahead and give me a call if you would like.

Isn’t all unemployment interim?

- I live in Grover myself on Ocean View and would be happy to help with your backyard dilemma. If you are still looking for help let me know, I can help out as soon as today.

Yeah, cause proximity to the dog shit is what matters.

-Hello I can do it immediately.. My name is sean I am not a weirdo..but I have a step son that will help me I am teaching him earning the dollar is life. We live
on stagecoach so not much for him to do there.. Call

Give this poor kid a playstation!

- Is this job still available? If not I am very interested. thank you Tracie

IF NOT, he is interested.

-Aloha, I hope you haven't hired anyone yet for the dirty work! I am very reliable! I do a lot of yard work for my family, friends and people in need of help. I just love to work. I hope i can help you out, i'm a 25 yr old male and am more than capable of helping you out and making your hard look great. If interested please let me know. I hope its not too late! Mahalo!
How do you make a Hard look great? Maybe it's a Hawaiin thing.

- Hi my name is luther i am willing to help u out i have a weedwacker and bags to haul it all off im not a weirdo or whacko lol im just someone looking for some extra $ times are hard please call me at home #####
Hey, I got nothing but time.

-hello, i would do the pooper scooper duty for you...i used to be a pet sitter....i can ask my husband but he will not be able to do it until friday or saturday for the other things....dep on the clean up around the house, i could see what that entails and maybe help with that...what were you wanting to pay for the work? when did you need it done by?
This lady is volunteering her husband to do??/
-and my favorites:

Subject: dog shit removal technician

wow, never thought i would put that in a subject line for potential employment. I bet my parents and high school guidance counselor would be proud. Anyway, im looking for odd jobs/general labor and and living in grover beach. Have operated heavy machinery/commercial fishing vessels and the like. I think i can handle a little dog poop. Please hit me back if the duty is still available as i am negotiable with salary plus desperate for some work. Thanks and kind regards-

Salary? Someone gets a salary for this?

-i need work and i have lots of xperience in wacking. please reply

Who admits they have wacking experience on a job application?

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Gary Turns 51 and We have an amazing culinary adventure

My husband has a need for speed and to feel alive. All this sitting in a room, pushing paper around, makes a man feel less than that heroic guy who has the number one plate in watercraft racing in California. So for to honor his annual trip around the sun (his birthdays), instead of cakes and parties, I make him feel alive. Last year for his 50th, he flew on the trapeze (video on You Tube, if you dare) and spent a culinary week in San Francisco (that is more my gig, but he loves the exceptional foods, dotting sommeliers and chef superstars). This year I bought him eight laps in a real NASCAR at Fontana track in California and a ride in an F-16 simulator, and a few surprises. Culinary wise, I scored a gig rating the best in LA, so the nights we bound to be fabulous.

We left Friday morning early to beat the traffic, but we were wrong, oh so wrong. The knuckle clenching traffic added three hours to our trip and I feared we would miss his chance around the track at 160 mph. Not wanting to take more time, we ate fast food. This is a feat that most Americans excel at, but not us. We did a Jack in The Box breakfast that made our tummies rumble for two hours and a Wendy’s chicken, something covered in a sweet-spicy sauce. Nasty.
We made it to the track with minutes to spare. It was impressive. Two and half miles of asphalt that grown people hurl there bodies around in a fiberglass frame and roll bar at 160 mph. Gary was in heaven. He suited up in the fire retardant suit, listened to the instructor, rode with the pace care, then rode with a professional driver to get the feel for the track and the car.

His car was number 7- his lucky number and he roared around that track passing everyone on the oval of speed. 15 laps later, he had a permanent grin on his face and wanted to rent the whole track for a day (at a cost of only $4,500). See Video.

We check into our super cute hotel in Chino (as it was centrally located for all our adventures and super cheap at $59.00 per night). With a swimming pool, continental breakfast, and lush grounds, it was a deal. The rooms were clean and spacious. We asked for the best restaurant around and the proprietor told us most people around there celebrate at Olive Garden. Ahhh you gotta love the suburbs. Everyone is so……..normal………………average…………not daring. We check Yelp, Yellow Pages and in room magazine and it seem that not only were there no privately owned restaurants (except a Basque one, that I love, and Gary not so much), so off to Olive Garden for endless salad bowls and bread sticks. I only acquiesced because of the Italian Margarita (made with Amaretto). Gary ordered the beef rib and I had the salad and a smoked Gouda cheese fondue. It was very good. The servers were attentive and not hovering, my only complaint was the lady in the next booth yakking on endlessly about a bad flight. I was surprised.

The next day we got up early and found a local cake bakery. We had four cupcakes and the best sugar cookies ever. In our search for a local breakfast place, we found several garage sales and then a flea market. Being pirates by nature, we parked facing the sun in the drive-in theater and scoured the booths for treasure. Gary found a perfect area rug for his office, I found a pair of Gucci sunglasses for $5.00, and we enjoyed the booths with Nazi memorabilia in a town with little or none of the “pure race.”
We finally found a local place called Honolulu Harry’s that boosted $5.00 Mai Tai’s, so we ran in. Decorated in early Tiki tacky, it had grand lunch specials and famous Mai Tai’s (for which I drank two). I had the seared Ahi with rice and macaroni salad, it was a generous portion for only $6.95 and high quality. Gary had pulled pork with rice and salad and we were contented.

Our next adventure loomed at the Mig Flight Simulator center in Anaheim. They take you and your group through a “ground school” then suit you up like Maverick and take you inside the cockpit of an F-16 fighter jet. You get 10 minutes to get used to the controls and flying and then you start dog fighting. Basically, blowing your new friends out of the sky. Control tower keeps watch, gives advice, and guides lost pilots back to the battlefield. Spectators watched on monitors. Then the pilots practiced landing the aircraft on a landing strip and on an aircraft carrier. When Gary missed and crashed in the ocean after a night attempt, he asked the tower for permission for a fly by (ala Top Gun). It was all entertaining.

Next, we had dinner reservations at the new hot spot in LA, Hatfield’s. This husband and wife team had a smaller place that they had outgrown, but were known for superb service and amazing provisions. They did not disappoint. Armed with a Julia’s Vineyard Foxen Pinot Noir and a Justin Justification, we were seated right next to the kitchen. Whose wall was made of glass, so every shuffle, turn, cut, slice, braise, flambé and more was watched over by the hungry masses. I loved this aspect, we could see the kitchen, but not hear it and everyone of the 15 chefs (we tried to distinguish the hierarchy by the size of their hats but found out the Chef de cuisine and the owner wore none and the tallest chef wore a small hat to prevent his head from bursting into flames).

We ordered the chefs choice, which was nine courses of his choice, not necessarily anything on the menu. Gary enlisted the Sommelier, Peter to pair each dish with his meals; I stuck with the Foxen, because I had to get us back to Chino. Peter proved to be creative, enticing and a genius with his liquid pairings. There are not enough adjectives for fabulous to explain this culinary adventure, so here is how the meal went:

Amuse-Bouche (a small appetizer meant to tease the palate before the meal): Chopped salmon with seaweed sprinkles in a white vingerette sauce. Beyond palate pleasing.

First Course: Sashimi Ahi (a form of Yellowtail tuna) with blanched anise stalks and duck cracklings (deeply fried duck skin) with a light ponzu sauce. It was paired with a Sauvignon Blanc Ribbonwood 08 Marlborough.

Second Course: Foie Gras, a goose liver that was soaked in Medeara wine and surrounded by a butter soaked brochette topped with a Grand Marnier sauce and all sitting in a pineapple reduction sauce. This is the first chef to try pineapple sweetness with the Foie Gras and it was a masterpiece. It was paired with an amazing Louis Roederer Brut Premier Reims, a white sparkling wine that blew your idea of how champagne should taste.

Third Course: Custard and Coconut Soup with deep-fried Sweetbreads on a skewer. This soup had butternut squash custard, coconut puree and had tiny mushrooms swimming in it. Off the hook good, the texture was original and the flavor phenomenal. It was paired with a Vinhas Helhas Luis Pato 2007 Bieras. Peter explained to us that this was a mixture of two rare white grapes that had a creamy smoke and mineral refinement. It was truly an original.

Fourth Course: Salmon Roulade, a smoked salmon wrapped in cabbage and lay on a bed of linguini with a habanera sauce. Amazing and subtle. It was paired with a 2007 Maranges “Le Croix Moines” that was raspberry forward with a bright elegant fruit.

Fifth Course: Roast Squab sitting on roatmeal with bulga lentils, micro-green salad and oatmeal flake. The flavors were wild, and yet comforting. It was paired with a 2005 Hallcrest Pinot Noir that bought out the sun roasted flavors and chewy herbal fruit.

Sixth Course: Braised Pork Belly with a Meyers lemon caviar (they make it with Meyers lemon juice and tapioca like substance) on top of green beans and a cabernet sauce. It was paired with a Cidre Greniers Brut Julien Fremont 2008, Normandy (basically an apple cider) that was out of the attic with a balance basket of off-dry core fruit. This combination was creative and perfection.

At this point, we did not think we could eat anymore, so Peter brought us a “punch thru the stomach Bushnell VSOP brandy shot. We did as instructed and shot it down. It worked and we were ready for more victuals.

Seventh Course: New York steak with a light sauce assembled on spectacular spatzel. It was paired with a Clarendon Hills Baker’s Gully Syrah. The steak was rare and bursting with aroma.

Eighth Course: A passion fruit Pavlova, which was a sorbet placed on a gueatua meringue that opened up the palate and prepared us for the sweets. That was paired with a Moscato d’Asti Gianni Doglia that reeked of peach blossoms and honey suckle.

Ninth Course: A chocolate soufflé with chicory chip cream that was paired with a Brachetto d’Acquil Il Saulino, a hardy port with raspberry and floral petal delicacy.

Tenth Course: A chocolate mousse Napoleon with a cocoa nib chip and an afagatto parfait. It was paired with a Boilermaker, which was an oatmeal stout, poured into a 20-year-old port. It was magnificent.

Our waiter was primarily Courtney, but Mark brought out the food. He was shy at first, mumbling our food descriptions. I said, “No one wants to be a waiter in LA, you came here to be a star, so project Damn’it.” After that, he sang our descriptions and was full of personality. The wait staff said I should stay and be his coach.

I would highly recommend Hatfield’s to anyone trying to experience the best in food and libations. The staff was knowledgeable and eager to please and pass on their knowledge. In addition, watching the kitchen was such a novelty, I would go back for that. This chef/owner is a true artist.

We limped home stuffed and happy and got up early the next day for my big adventure:
Universal studios. We got VIP passes that meant - all you can eat in most the restaurants and front of the line passes. We ran from attraction to attraction, enjoying all, but mostly the Water World Show and the Mummy ride (4 times). I had two $10 beer’s, but they we so welcome in the hustle of the day. We were there for 10 hours and I Twittered that my inner child was exhausted.

The next day we were scheduled to see a taping of Chelsea Lately, but that didn’t happen, so we had lunch with my famous friends and discovered the Garment and Diamond district.

Santee alley must be experienced. For eternal pirates like our selves, we were salivating. All the designers were there and thousands of start-ups. We bought jewelry, fragrances, handbags, clothes, and ostrich shoes. With our tootsies throbbing and our credit cards tapped, we ducked into a Starbucks to reclaim our kingdom via caffeine. That is when I found that Rivera was right around the corner. This bastinade of Latin food has been calling my palate for over a year. We changed from shopping clothes to dining clothes in the car and strolled in to start at the tapas’ bar.

Ken our waiter had just returned from a viniculture tour of the Central Coast and recognized our Justin Isolece (we later shared the Justification I had in the trunk). We choose to eat at the tapas’ bar as the chef, Kiana proved too enticing to resist. Rivera is known for their Mix-ologist whose command of flavors of the high-octane mixtures is legendary. Gary started with the Freebird, a fusion of bourbon, homemade grenadine, soda water and basil leaves was not only refreshing, but changed his personality. He became the friend to all and it worked out to our favor. He started with the chocolate torte soaked in a drunken pineapple sauce (tequila and lime), with a pineapple dusted into the plate in chocolate powder.

I started with the patates xips caviar with chipotle-lime crema, floating under a mound of beluga caviar and spread onto house made Kennebec potato chips. It was the most original presentation of caviar I have experienced.

Then we had the Melon de mar, a poached Maine lobster with compressed melon (made to look like roe) and a chile verge gelee (hot chile little cubes of jello). AMAZING.
The conchas, which we raw Kamuto Oysters on the half shell with cucumber caviar and mezcal sauce blew our minds. Kiana explained every detail and the sommelier brought over several treats for us to try.

Next, we had the playa bar ceviche, which was raw tuna served over a bed of marinated jicama, Serrano chiles, a lime sauce and avocado’s. It was perfect. We paired it with a Spanish tickler, which was rhum, mango, lillet, habanero chardamom and seltzer. Spicy and refreshing.
For a transition course, Ken suggested the Cordero Vasco, a Basque lamb chops dish with chorizo, piquillos, olives, and capers. The plate had a woman’s face dusted on it in chocolate powder.

The Mole called my name as every chef makes it differently and Ken had told us that this chef makes his at home so no one knew the secret ingredients. For the uninitiated in Latin delicacies, Mole (pronounced Moh-Lay), is loosely translated to “concoction.” It is a rich, dark, reddish brown sauce usually served with poultry. It tastes of chocolate, garlic, pepitas and chiles. This was served on a Kurobuta pork chop with sweet potato (purple and orange) on the side. Unbelievable.

We had the three Spanish cheeses for desert with a sangria jus and crusty bread. We both sipped on a Spanish port.

It was then Gary decided that we were spending the night at the Ritz Carlton. Not one to argue when the husband loosens up the purse strings, I immersed myself in luxury as only the Ritz can do. We were surprised to find a Mormon bible next to the traditional Kideons in the desk drawer. We basked in the cheese and wine bar decorated with the set pieces from the movie The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, and had a super breakfast in the executive suite the next morning.

We strolled through the diamond district and Mr. Bayus was generous with my ear lobs and ring fingers. Then we went again to the fashion district were we picked up some amazing bargains on designer clothing and purses. At 4:00 pm, we started home, only to be stuck in 405 traffic, so we got off on Santa Monica Blvd and hit the thrift stores. I looked thru the t-shirt section searching for movie swag and scored some funny/cool shirts for our weekend wear. The best store was Hadassah run, and I found a $3,000 watch for $30.00 bucks.

We went to the Promenade Mall in Santa Monica and at the Monsoon Grill, which was awful and expensive. We got on the road at 10 pm after more shopping, with the trunk and back seat full of treasures and memories.

Next year, we are doing the dude ranch experience for his birthday.

Monday, March 29, 2010

Finding my new face

If I was the ruler of the universe, and lord knows I should be, I would make some things into a permanent, irrevocable law. These are my laws in order of importance:
Once you have found an esthetician (Facial girl for those dudes) that knows, understands, and makes your skin glow, she can NEVER quit. She has to do your make-up for your funeral.
Other people who can NEVER quit once they’ve been pondered over, checked out and reviewed are my maids, my hairdresser, my mechanic and the girl who makes cupcakes.
Dogs can never die.
Children switch parents when they become teenagers. They will listen to the new set of parents for at least a year before those parents become immense idiots too.
Good books appear every Sunday and you never have to waste a minute on bad fiction.
Restaurants only can charge you what you think the meal and the service was worth.
Everyone has a “Replicator” so you can have any material possession you want, you just have to dispose of it by recycling or it is yours forever.
Wine is free.

This train of thought came to me, as I was strapped to a bed waiting for my sixth attempt at finding a new esthetician. Mine recently retired (even through my hailstorm of begging, pleading, and crying) and now my face is falling to pieces and all I have met is whopping weirdoes.
Try number # 1 landed me with a geographically desirable lady (her office was behind mine), but she didn’t test her wax and gave my upper lip third degree burns.

Then I went to the expensive one, who shares an office with a doctor. In making my appointment, they insisted that I give them my credit card number, so they can charge me if I didn’t show up to the scheduled appointment. I don’t share my credit cards with my husband, so there was NO way bimbo #2 was getting it.

Attempts, 3, 4, and 5 kind of went like; I made an appointment, walked in the door, spent 5 minutes talking about them and the products they use and then me running screaming out of the strip malls. These girls were beyond intellectually challenged.

Tonight was attempt 6. She seemed okay until she spilled an enormous glob of steaming hot wax onto my chest thus searing my necklace to my throat for at least 3 months. Then she told me how the doctor had told her she needed glasses, but she didn’t really feel she needed them for work. Really? As you are pouring hot wax on my skin, then ripping it off, you don’t need to see clearly? I ran screaming home and put a nipple on a bottle of wine.

I cannot give up. My face needs a supportive individual to keep it spree and dare I say pretty. The search goes on.

P.S. Do not suggest your “great gal”; all six of mine were recommendations. I will find her; she is out there, like the great white buffalo.

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Small Business Ownership Joy: Two employees out sick, another pregnant, a sick one showed up to give us all a fever, customer shat himself in my store, over drawn at the bank because of a bounced check from a large client & my husband bellows at me over email etiquette. It is so glamorous to steer your own ship.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010


It is kind of like puberty, so much potential, physical upheaveal, and emotional challenges. Moon cycles change, body changes too and my mind, it is a confusing mess in there, a hot mess.

The doctors claim it is hormones, the sheets in the morning do not lie. I awake in a puddle of sweat each morning. I am lost, confused and feel, out of my body. Something is wrong. I have gained 30 pounds in 3 months and have quit eating. When I do eat, it is organic whole food.

I’m confused. I want to run away. My children are grown, husband and dog well trained. My businesses run without me. There is a voice in my head whispering, “Teri, it is time, your time.” What the fuck does that mean? Sure I paid my dues, been a dutifully wife, mother (even raised kid that weren’t mine) and friend. I helped and watched in agony as my little sister died too soon. Failed at businesses, finances, and marriages. I won awards, sold screenplays, and did nearly impossible tasks.

However, the slate is clear. All karmic bills paid. All chores done. All promises delivered. It is just me in the mirror, with a beard.

I’m confused. I always know the answer for everyone else; it is so easy, so transparent. Nevertheless, my destiny is a myriad of choices, paths, and obstacles. The biggest one being me. I can do anything, be anyone, but I don’t know what that is.

I need some time in the looking glass, and this time I will take the blue pill.

Thrift Store Heaven

My husband has freakishly good luck at finding nice thinks at garage sales, thrift stores and even on the side of the road. He call those treasures, “come across” and I must pull over violating 15 laws every time we see a sweatshirt on the side of the road. They weird thing is that they almost always fit him. One time he even found a big screen TV that had hopped out of the back of a truck. As we stood there and pondered how to get the behemoth into my trunk, the owners arrived and we helped them load it back in the truck and tie it down.

He decided to direct the Thrift Universe into knowing what he wanted. He went to Patrick James and Calvin Klein and found his perfect size, fit, style, etc. Then he put it out there to the universe and every darn weekend, he finds a new treasure. Custom made Italian suits bought in Paris, Camel hair and Cashmere sports coats, Silk, Wool, all beautiful, hardly worn and for the exorbitant price of $7.99. He has found perfect fitting Burberry jackets for $3.99 and cordovan shoes (that were never worn) for $1.99.

His newest finds are at our local Goodwill. Some man with the same measurements as him must have passed and Goodwill got all his custom-made Italian suits, sport jackets, shoes, and shirts. He spends hours every weekend trying on his magical clothing. They bring new stuff out every week, so the issue was how to mark the one’s he already had tried on.

His brilliant plan to “mark” the jackets he had already tried and rejected is to bring a sack of pennies and put a penny in the pocket of each suit already tried. So if you buy a suit and it has a penny in the pocket, Gary rejected it.

With a jar full of pennies, we set out each weekend. I find my share of items, but nothing like the windfall that has besieged my husband’s closet. People comment on all the money he must be spending for this new wardrobe, he just smiles. After he told me he had enough different outfits to wear a different one every day of a month, I was getting jealous. Why weren’t the Thrift Universe honoring me?

While he was trying on a gorgeous suit at a Catholic School Thrift store, I happened upon a enormous statue that I immediately fell in love with. It was from Africa, carved wood and matched my décor perfectly. He was tucked back in the manager’s office, hidden in thrift store shame. I asked the clerk about him and if the piece was for sale. She feigned surprise and asked, “Did you see the whole statue?”
“Yes, it is quite beautiful”
“But did you notice he is not a Ken doll, he is anatomically correct?”
“Yes, I saw that and my living room is filled with naked statues, how much?”
“You really want him?”
“Yes, how much?”
“Oh Thank God, I was sure I was going to loose my job if I didn’t get him out of here by Tuesday! If the manager of the store saw him, she would faint. Daryl, get that naked man for this lady and carry him out to her car!”

Yes, she gave it to me! The certificate of Authenticity was on the bottom with the artist name and the original price of $5500.00!

Seems the art Gods are shining on me now and I’ll go look for suits anytime the husbands asks!