Saturday, March 21, 2009

Drunken Rain Musings

New musings from a twisted mind full of nachos and wine on a raining day by the beach.

I have a new philosophy- I’m only going to dread one day at a time.

Who, besides strippers, wears a Yellow Feather Boa to a Rotary event?

I would get pregnant again if I knew I would have puppies.

I have found if I really want something, it appears at a garage sale on Saturday. This week I wanted a new husband. Didn’t like what I found on the .25 cent table.

Kids only call to talk to you if they want money or food.

I am trying to rearrange my life so I don't have to even be present.

Why at conventions (mass people events) the chicken always tastes like rubber and the fish is over cooked?

I hate name tags.

The uterus is a tracking device.

If a contractor says a job will take about two weeks, figure three months.

Is it morally wrong to let suckers keep their money?

(Should be across my husbands forehead) A sure sign of a nervous breakdown is thinking that your work is terribly important.

Why do writers write? Because it is there.

There is no thief like a bad book.

Do You Know Who I Almost Am?


  1. I would get pregnant again if I knew I would have puppies.


  2. OMG! This is my Sunday morning laugh! Thank you! Thank you!

  3. Who are you? Steven Wright?

    I bought a decaf coffee table. No one can tell the difference.


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